I can't sleep. I feel blue.

I can't sleep. I don't know why but I'm feeling so hopeless about this weight loss journey. I feel so overwhelmed by this feeling of failure. I had a bad night of eating and it's all I can think about. I feel so guilty about the food choices I made and I can't stop focusing on it.


I feel like I'm losing my focus and my drive. Yesterday I was cruising on high, but today I'm just down on myself. I'm doubting myself right now, my drive, my determination. It's so hard. I think about the goal I've set for myself and I can't see myself achieving it. I feel defeated and I'm exhausted. I've lost my focus and my vision of my goal. I'm so tired and I can barely put together sentences.


I haven't been sleeping well all week. I've been feeling very cooped up and bored for a few days and all I want to do is free myself from this feeling. It's manifesting itself in how I'm eating. I just want to pig out. I want freedom from work, school, taking care of myself and my home, counting calories and logging workouts. It's all getting to me. 


I get this way every winter and it's horrible. I want nice weather. I want to run outside. I want to roll the windows down and blast music in my car. 


I wish I was seeing better results from myself. I wish these pounds were melting off faster. Summer is approaching and I want to wear a bikini but I'm starting to think that won't be possible. I hate this feeling and I hate thinking like this. I've lost my strength.